


The Space Between Us

by PsychelogicalProblem, stardustedruins



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Astronaut Oikawa Tooru, Doctor Iwaizumi Hajime, M/M, Outer Space
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-14
Updated: 2020-11-14
Packaged: 2021-03-09 17:39:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27560140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PsychelogicalProblem/pseuds/PsychelogicalProblem, https://archiveofourown.org/users/stardustedruins/pseuds/stardustedruins
Summary: “I want to be an astronaut Iwa-chan.” Oikawa says with a bright smile and he avoids Iwaizumi’s gaze, eyes intently staring at the night sky freckled with stars, the crescent moon hanging low.“Took you long enough.” Iwaizumi responds easily, but Oikawa can feel the intensity of Iwaizumi’s gaze upon him. His lips twitch but he continues to face forward, eyes tracing the stars, naming constellations in his head - Andromeda, Auriga, Cassiopeia, Orion, Fornax -In which Oikawa Tooru is an astronaut who leaves for his first mission, leaving behind Iwaizumi Hajime on Earth.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 8
Kudos: 33





	The Space Between Us

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This story was originally written for a writing competition in my university. The theme was to write a story centered around space. Since I am IwaOi trash, my first thought was obviously an astronaut Oikawa being separated from Iwaizumi who's still on Earth. 
> 
> This was written in a bit of a rush and not my best writing, so [@PsychelogicalProblem](https://archiveofourown.org/users/PsychelogicalProblem) helped by adding in some parts and editing certain other parts. Thank you for that.
> 
> Hopefully you guys enjoy the story!

* * *

Oikawa Tooru sits cocooned in his blanket as he stares at the star stickers glued to his ceiling. They glow fluorescent in the dark and for a fleeting moment, Oikawa imagines himself standing in an actual rocket in space. The vastness of the universe calls out to him and Oikawa stretches his fingertips as if responding to the call, but he pictures emerald orbs and the moment shatters. He opens his eyes and he’s back in his room again. 

Oikawa exhales slowly and with trembling hands picks up his phone. This is inevitable, he might as well just get it over with now. He checks the contact name once, just to make sure he’s right - he’s stalling, taking the seconds he’s got left before Iwaizumi and him part ways forever. He can’t remember a life without Iwaizumi Hajime and just the prospect of such a life makes his chest ache. Tears slide down his cheeks even as the line rings and then Iwaizumi picks up.

Oikawa hears the sleepiness in his voice and can tell Iwaizumi is annoyed as he grumbles “Trashykawa this better be important, it’s one in the morning.”

He swallows and then “Meet me on the roof Iwa-chan?”

There’s a long sigh, the rustling of sheets and then a quiet “Sure.”

He knows Iwaizumi is wide awake now, fully alert. Oikawa suspects Iwaizumi had been waiting for this moment all along. He wouldn’t be surprised, after all they’ve known each other for fourteen years - know each inside out,  _ two halves of a whole. _

Oikawa delivers the news like a long hidden confession, even though he knows that with Iwaizumi those kinds of theatrics aren’t needed. It’s for his own protection he does it, to make things as normal as possible, so that letting each other go would be easier - no awkwardness, no stilted silence.

“I want to be an astronaut Iwa-chan.” Oikawa says with a bright smile and he avoids Iwaizumi’s gaze, eyes intently staring at the night sky freckled with stars, the crescent moon hanging low. 

“Took you long enough.” Iwaizumi responds easily, but Oikawa can feel the intensity of Iwaizumi’s gaze upon him. His lips twitch but he continues to face forward, eyes tracing the stars, naming constellations in his head -  _ Andromeda, Auriga, Cassiopeia, Orion, Fornax - _

“I’d be gone for long periods, I wouldn’t even be on the planet Iwa-chan.” he says it cheerfully, but he can’t look at Iwaizumi and he knows Iwaizumi will understand the implication behind it. He feels a light flick on his forehead and although it doesn’t hurt he still pouts childishly, unwilling to let this end. 

“Iwa-chan you meanie. I’m stating facts.”

“Tooru.” Iwaizumi says quietly, but Oikawa knows the tone well enough.  **_Look at me._ **

He turns and faces Iwaizumi. He’s ready for Iwaizumi to tell him that in university, they’ll meet new people and it’s time they go their own separate ways. He wants to close his eyes, but he wills himself to meet Iwaizumi’s eyes - green against brown.

“I don’t care whether you’re in Japan, in the States, or on the moon. Nothing is strong enough to break our friendship.” Iwaizumi says, firm and clear. Oikawa blinks, face pinching in confusion and relief at the same time. He might cry again at this rate. “Besides,” Iwaizumi continues “If I’d wanted to run away, I would have already. I stayed because I wanted to. I’m not going anywhere Trashykawa.”

Oikawa sniffles, a steady stream of tears rolling down his cheeks and then he flings himself onto Iwaizumi with a soft wail of “Iwa-chan!”

Iwaizumi sighs, hugging him back and then “Don’t cry so loudly, you’ll wake up the entire neighbourhood.”

“ _ Thank you Hajime. _ ”

And just like that Oikawa knows that everything is going to be alright.

It is alright, for the longest time, until Oikawa breaks it again. He’s twenty four when he’s offered his first mission - one of the youngest astronauts in history. He accepts without any hesitation. That evening, Iwaizumi and him celebrate in their shared apartment, but Oikawa can tell, underneath all the happiness and pride, Iwaizumi is worried and fear begins to spread in his chest again.

On the morning of his departure, Oikawa is a mess of knots wrapped in anxiety and fear. His hands tremble like he’s seventeen again, but it’s Iwaizumi and so Iwaizumi knows,  _ he always does _ . Iwaizumi makes Oikawa sit down on the couch and then wraps Oikawa’s hands in his own.

“Ever heard of Icarus, Iwa-chan?” Oikawa blurts out softly.

“There are days when I wonder whether you’re the sun, or you’re Icarus.” 

“Which one’s better?” Oikawa asks.

Iwaizumi raises an eyebrow and then shakes his head “It doesn’t matter which one you are, I’ll be your tether, I’ll tie you down to Earth so you don’t crash or burn,  _ so you’ll always find your way back home _ .”

Oikawa’s breath hitches and then he buries his face into Iwaizumi’s shoulder. 

And just like that, Oikawa feels the knots untangle and his chest feels lighter.

The take off was everything Oikawa had hoped for. He’s strapped to his seat, just like the dozens of simulations, and it’s all he can do to remind himself that this time it’s real. He’s leaving Earth. ( _ Somewhere inside him, a voice whispers that he’s leaving Iwaizumi, but he tries to not think about it.)  _ The sound of the countdown in his headset fills his ears, and he forces himself to relax. The numbers go down and the distance increases, and the pressure on his body goes up, and for an awful second, dread fills him as he remembers the countless stories of failed launches, people burning to a crisp in their shuttles, and crying families. The image of a crying Iwaizumi forces itself into his mind, and he nearly lurches in his seat, sick. 

And then he’s in space. He’s alive. He looks outside in awe, the beauty of the vast nothingness captivating him, along with the feeling of sheer incredulity. It’s only when his crewmate calls to him, he snaps back to reality. 

“Oikawa, get your act together. you've been zoning out for an hour.”

“Buzz off, it’s normal to feel captivated by space when you’re first in it.”

Nakamura responds by throwing a list at Oikawa, which he can barely catch. “Yeah? Well, you’ll be sick of it soon enough. Check if the areas on the list are functioning.”

Oikawa swallows back a disagreeing retort, and complies. He only sneaks glances outside when Nakamura’s around after that, satisfying himself with the thought of telling Iwaizumi all about it.

Video calls are hard to do, but Oikawa and Iwaizumi try. Iwaizumi’s schedule is arguably more terrible than Oikawa, being a doctor, and the number of five-minutes calls in which Iwaizumi haphazardly threw himself in front of the screen, saying ‘ _ I have a shift in a bit, but what’s up?’  _ only seemed to grow larger and larger. But Oikawa takes every chance he gets to spill all of his experiences, and Iwaizumi listens with a fond smile.

_ “Iwa-chan you won’t believe how the Earth looks from here. It’s so different.” _

_ “Iwa-chan I saw a meteor shower today and our planet just lit up like a Christmas tree.” _

_ “Iwa-chan I miss milk bread!” _

_ “Iwa-chan I went outside the rocket for the first time today, don’t worry I was tethered to the rocket. But our universe is so huge Iwa, I want to explore all of it.” _

Nakumura side-eyes him when he speaks the last line to Iwaizumi, so after Oikawa cuts the call, he turns to face him. “Any problem?”

Nakamura makes an expression of mock sincerity. “Me? No, never.”

“Then I’d appreciate it if you could  _ stop _ .” Oikawa hisses. He turns to walk past Nakamura, shoving his shoulder against the other man, but Nakamura stops him.

“It’s just…” The man seems flustered. The smugness in his earlier actions has disappeared, a sort of desperate curiosity remaining. “You’re seriously still excited? It’s been months. Don’t you want this to end already? Go home?”

Oikawa hears the raw longing in his voice, and he immediately understands. Nakamura had it worse than the rest of them, with finding out that his wife was pregnant two weeks before they had taken off. He would be missing his wife’s pregnancy, his child’s birth and the first part of its life, and it’s only now Oikawa is able to understand just how much of a toll that must have taken on the man under his veneer of snide superiority.

But Oikawa can’t sympathize. He misses Iwaizumi, his friends, his family, sure, but space means  _ everything  _ to him. The pay-off for years of hard work, the beauty, the discovery. He opens his mouth to respond to the man’s unasked question:  _ what about your family _ ? “He’ll understand if I stay in space.” A small smile crosses his face. “In fact he might just kick me back up here if I come back without finishing my job.”

The tension between Nakamura and Oikawa pretty much disappears after this exchange. They had just been running through some routine drills, trading well-meaning insults and retorts in an effort to pass time, when the spaceship shakes violently. Nakahara curses and makes his way to communications, presumably to relay a message to headquarters, when he emerges from the room, his face is pale.

“O-Oikawa.” A look of terror was on his face. “Communications are down."

Apparently, a meteorite strike hit them and they lost total communication. The rocket had sustained some damages and had spun out of control.

“Nakamura and Oikawa get to the far end of the bay and check on the wiring there. Suzuki, Honda and I will keep the systems in check here.” the ship’s captain, Yamamoto commands them. Nakamura looks terrified, but grim determination makes its way on his face again. Oikawa felt that will solidify in his own chest. Somehow, they manage to stop the engine fluctuations.

Yamamoto looks severe when they make their way back, and when he says the next few words, Oikawa can barely hear him.

_ They had veered off course. _

After that, time begins to just slip by. Two weeks to figure out that a black hole was pulling them towards it, two months to put together a plan to move away from it, constant fixing of the ship, of gauging the fuel, of rationing supplies and checking for any signs of help. It took three weeks for them to get away from the black hole’s gravity.

It would take even more time to get back to Earth.

  
  


It is in these empty months - Oikawa finds himself hating space. Dreams of Iwaizumi visit him every night, of all the things he should have said and never did. He dreams and hopes a bit and then prays and he wrecks himself worrying about Iwaizumi who’s probably worried about him. 

It is in these four months - a chasm between this life and another-- Nakamura opens up to the crew. He confesses in a shaking voice his fear and worries about his child-- he doesn’t even know if it’s a son or a daughter-- and his voice cracks as he says ‘ _ it might not ever know its father’ _ before he breaks down. The vulnerability from the man seems to set off the crew, and somewhat hesitantly, all the crew members confess their biggest regrets and they realize that all of them are things that were too scared to do. They regret not reaching out to their parents, they regret ‘ _ the one who got away’ _ , and Yamamoto grimly says he regrets not taking better care of them and they see just how much he’s been blaming himself for the current mishap. No one can comfort him. Somewhere deep inside themselves, they had all blamed him at least once. So they just sit in silence.

Oikawa steadily avoids eye-contact as he tells them about Iwaizumi, his green eyes and exasperated smiles and his constant company, and a look of understanding crosses on Nakamura’s face. So they become each other’s solaces, provide strength to each other, keep each other motivated and have each other’s backs.

So Oikawa works on the ship and he continues to dream of green orbs as bright as emerald, dark raven hair as spiky as a hedgehog and a gruff and deep voice calling out his name. He prays that Iwaizumi is still tethering him to Earth because all he wanted was to hug Iwaizumi and feel like he was coming home.

  
  


Four months later. They’ve finally re-established connection with the main tower, and for the first time in months, they all cheer, genuinely, happily. After an initial flurry of questions, Yamamoto says he’ll update the tower while excusing the other crew members to speak to their own loved ones.

All of them are basically racing to the communications room. Nakamura looks like he can hardly believe this being the truth. Oikawa feels his heart race in his chest as he calls Iwaizumi, his legs bounce of their own accord and he can hardly sit still. The call doesn’t go through the first time, so he tries to persevere, trying again and again. He catches sight of Nakamura’s screen-- a young woman with black hair lifting up a young girl to the screen. It must be Nakamura’s daughter. He sneaks a glance at Nakamura. There are tears running down his face.

The video call is picked up, and Oikawa cries out a loud “ _ Iwa-chan! _ ” and he’s met with emerald green hues, but now they’re real. He hears Iwazumi say “ _ Trashykawa _ .” and there’s such fondness in Iwaizumi’s voice and warmth fills Oikawa’s chest. It is then he realizes that Iwaizumi is crying.

“Iw-Iwa-chan are you crying?” Oikawa asks, blinking at the screen in shock. He feels weird because he knows that the person on the screen is Iwaizumi, but his hair is shorter and he looks leaner, he looks a little older and there are light bad underneath his eyes, his face is much more angled and Oikawa wonders how much stress Iwaizumi had been carrying these past few months.  _ Because of him.  _ Of course Iwaizumi was stressed. There had been no contact for over four months.

“Shut up.” Iwaizumi replies as if on reflex, rubbing at his eyes. Then he quietly adds “I missed you.”

Oikawa stares, eyes widening imperceptibly. Iwaizumi’s voice sounds much more deeper and huskier. Has he been crying a lot or something? Guilt pricks at him.. “I’m sorry for making you worry Hajime.” Oikawa tries to smile softly “I missed you too. But you kept your promise of tethering me to the earth and I had to keep my promise of coming back home.”

Iwaizumi chuckles, voice cracking as more tears roll down his cheeks and Oikawa feels his stomach unsettling, he’s never seen Iwaizumi cry so much before.

“I thought you were - I thought - I gave up - I - ” Iwaizumi sobs, unable to meet Oikawa’s eyes.

“Iwa-chan don’t worry I’m coming back home now.” Oikawa tries to reassure him, his worry and anxiety increasing by the minute. “We have just enough fuel to get back to Earth. I’ll be a little early from the trip but I hope you’ve been keeping my room clean.” He smiles broadly.

He doesn’t expect Iwaizumi’s expression to fall flat, eyebrows furrowing and frown etching onto his face. 

“Iwa-chan?” Oikawa asks confused because Iwaizumi is acting weird and he can’t read his best friend.  _ Did six months of being in space take that away from him? _

“Oikawa how - how long do you think you’ve been gone for?” Iwaizumi asks cautiously, like he’s afraid to hear the answer.

Oikawa swallows hard before answering, a smile still plastered onto his face “Six months Iwa-chan. We lost contact with the main tower four months ago.”

Around him, he can hear Nakamura sobbing louder, and he thinks, wasn’t Nakamura’s wife pregnant when they left? How was her child so old already? Visceral horror mars Iwaizumi’s face and he struggles to speak. Oikawa feels his gut clench and he wants to run away from what Iwaizumi is about to tell him., the pieces falling together on their own. But Iwaizumi says it anyway , making it real, while Oikawa sits rooted to the place and he feels his heart drop at what Iwaizumi says next, horror carving onto his own face.

(“ _ Don’t you think you’ll ever get sick of space?” _

_ “It’s so beautiful and interesting, I doubt I’d even notice.) _

**_“Oikawa you’ve been - you’ve been gone for four years.”_ **

* * *


End file.
